as she awoke...

the soft hum of music wrestles her from a dream she can't remember... a delicate beam of sunlight breaks through the fabric curtains that shield her from the blinding white snow view outside... as her limbs warm up in preparation for climbing out of bed, she gazes up at the ceiling, laughing to herself about the memories of the night that ended only hours ago... there's no evidence of its existence, other than the faded stamped star on the back of her hand and a few digital pictures...

her body stretches across the bed in a perfect diagonal, as though to avoid feeling lonely within its large space by taking up as much room as possible... the air seems to have a slight scent of cologne about it, although it's obvious there's no one in the room but her... she remembers when that scent was real... when it was accompanied by a warm body resting next to her... she would stroke his hair or press her warm body up against his naked back... now she pulls the covers up to her chin to trap in the warmth one last time before crawling out...

black eyeliner smears the bottoms of her eyes... she never removes it before she sleeps, although always means to... a rush of anxiety comes over her as she realizes all the things she must do today... as she steps into the hall, she is greeted by closed doors only... no sound, no one... there's an overwhelming temptation to crawl right back in where she came from, to the warmth of the covers... but as she gazes upon the tangled mess of coloured fabric, she confirms how lonely, empty it looks... and as the winter chill of the house erases the body warmth soaked into the sheets, it becomes less and less inticing...

to her, it feels like one of those days when you wake up to another, lightly wrestling them awake and press your warm bodies together, savouring every bit of body heat you've created... the two of you smile and laugh about anything -- from what happened the night before, to a conversation from weeks ago or seamless witty banter... she tosses and turns around in the invading piles of covers, with the ultimate goal of climbing on top of him... softly and lovingly the two wake themselves with a familiar and favourable feeling... there's confidence that they could spend the day in a state of perpetual slumber, although it sounds absurd...

but alas, as she gazes once again upon the bed, she reconfirms its empty state... its uninviting covers that have gone cold in the matter of minutes she's left them behind... thus she leaves the room... and stops thinking of him...